
My name is Steffani. I am a daughter, a friend, a girlfriend, a nurse. I am
a typical girl living in Cleveland, Ohio at the age of 24. I thought
nothing could penetrate the safety of my world, as most young adults tend
to imagine. Life, however, plays by its own terms, and a diagnosis of lupus
came knocking when I least suspected it. What a birthday present - 23 years
old and diagnosed with systemic lupus. My world was crumbling around me.
The next few months brought nothing but heart-wrenching news. My friend was
killed in an ATV accident, my best friend’s step mom succumbed to cancer,
my cat ran away, and I was a new nurse. I felt as if I was being punished.
For what, I wasn’t sure, but the pain was more than I could handle. My body
was changing- my hair started falling out, the rash on my face, arms, and
chest never went unnoticed by a stranger, my bones were aching, depression
was hitting hard, 20 lbs of body weight vanished. I’ve learned, however,
that in order to rise above the sadness, sometimes you have to hit rock
bottom to push off the surface and start your climb. But the thing that
became clear was that I didn’t have to climb alone. Family and friends
banded together to give me their hands. I was reminded how powerful love
can be in the face of darkness. I was reminded that I’m a fighter. I was
reminded that survival is what we put forth. I was reminded that I couldn’t
give up. I feel now as if I’ve been given a second chance to be a better
person because of my diagnosis, to make every day count. Too much time is
wasted on being selfish, lonely, angry, guarded, and afraid. Every song has
an ending, but that’s no reason not to enjoy the music. Living with lupus
has taught me to take better care of myself- to be healthier, kinder, and
to love and laugh more often. Life is a precious commodity. Lupus has
taught me to embrace that idea. To appreciate my loved ones without fail,
to believe that I am a strong woman, and to never stop dancing when
hardships threaten to turn off the music. My name is Steffani, and I’m
proud to be a lupus patient.